This is my 200th post on this blog. I probably should be doing something fun and interesting to celebrate, but I am running low on ye ol' fun and interesting. Easter, and then Maddie's birthday, have totally sucked all the creativity right on out of me!
So, I apologize for the fact that this post is absolutely, tragically, un-fun and un-interesting.
I just really feel the need to confess, to unburden my soul, to you my dear, dear readers.
I hate housework.
Not only do I hate it, I am really kinda bad at it.
I think the main problem is that I find it so horribly non-stimulating, and then my ADD kicks in and I get easily distracted and drift away in the middle of the project . . . leave the dishwasher half unloaded, the laundry unfolded, or worse, forget to move it into the dryer.
I wish I could be one of these really anal OCD people who have to have a clean house or they can't sleep. It is all to easy for me to ignore, forget, or just plain not care and konk out on my unmade bed. But there is still that quiet, nagging voice inside that continues to let me know I haven't done enough, or done it right, and just can't quite measure up to "good enough."
I also have a deep-seated, secret jealousy of suburban Ritalin moms. You know the ones who are getting it all done, perfect house, perfect kids, involved in every activity and always on the go - because they're popping ADD drugs on the sly from their illegal stash in the glove box of their SUVs . . . I didn't say it was a rational jealousy. Although, my guess is that if I might actually qualify for adult ADD meds and they'd just bring me up to normal as opposed to Super-Mom.
They say confession is good for the soul. Is housework the bane of your existence like it is mine? Is there something that makes you feel like you aren't good enough? Or are you one of those women who has got it all together? I promise I won't hold it against you if you are . . . ok, maybe just a little bit.
I am just like that. My house is, well, "lived in" ... I'm no good with housework. And I, too, am easily distracted. Or I attempt to "multi-task" and end up getting nothing done! I envy the "got-it-all-together-super-moms" too. Like I'm not good enough or failing at my ability to be a homemaker. Especially with my Fibro and constant sickness, somedays, nothing gets done! So, yeah, I can relate. (((hugs)))
ReplyDeleteYou asked for an opinion so here's mine: when my little guy is big and having kids of his own, he'll remember that I spent time with him, not time cleaning the house. When kids are little it's insane to try to keep a clean house. Spend your time making sure the food is wholesome and the kids are too! Do what you can, when you can, and that's it. No one is judging you but you. So give yourself a hall pass--the world doesn't end just because you can declare dust bunnies as dependents. I see those soccer moms you're talking about and I always imagine them to have beautiful facades to hide their myriad faults; in my my mind, no one can do all that and stay perky. I don't have it all together and I don't want to--that's where my creativity stems from!
ReplyDeleteI hate housework too. Really truly. I found the Flylady (flylady.net) years ago because I realized I had no idea what the world I was doing to keep house after I got married and had a baby, and I was drowning in the guilt all the mess created. I'm definitely not judging you. Just commiserating. And letting you know that there is a gentle non-perfect way of keeping up with things without being ADD crazy mom. Also, I don't really think those moms have it as together as they would like everyone to believe. At least that's what I tell myself. ;)
ReplyDeleteJess, you know I sympathize! Here's something to keep in mind that I've been learning lately: There is no such thing as perfect. Perfection is an illusion! In the words of Leo Babauta, "You can't do everything - you've got to prioritize. So don't stress over those things that don't get done - you'll never have a day when everything on your list is done." I guess I never really realized that, so it was good for me to hear. I feel like we think that we're expeceted to be perfect, and we don't realize that it's actually unattainable so we drive ourselves crazy! Also, great job on all the writing lately! <3
ReplyDeleteI claim this theory as truth: Creative spaces are messy spaces. And its correlary: Creative people are messy people. That's my only defense.
ReplyDeleteI lucked out--my roommate likes to clean, and is okay with the fact that I don't. I will clean the kitchen sometimes... I find it therapeutic to do the dishes. Beyond that, I hate it. My stuff is always out rather than put away (the better to find it, after all), and don't get me started on laundry. I have one basket for clean clothes and one for dirty. It's my system and it works for me.
ReplyDeletePlease don't judge me, but I actually like SOME housework. (I like being productive). Its a good thing, though, because if I didn't I don't think I'd like my kids very much. I'm looking around my living room right now and I see: a happy 4 year old, a milk-drunk 3 month old, a bunch of toys and "stuff" on the floor, three baskets of laundry (clean but unfolded), and a big pile of fabric (looks like the thrift store exploded on my table top - these are my unfinished projects). Gotta go - I've got to get the laundry finished up before the toddler wakes up and starts taking it all around the house (talk about aggravating!)
ReplyDeleteI hate housework. Don't mind laundry, but as for cleaning the house... I hate it. Today, I washed my kitchen floor. And sometime this evening, someone will spill something really sticky on it. Happens nearly every time.
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way. I also recently found the fly lady website. I was a bit put off because it's a messy website for something that is supposed to help you clean and organize. I started at the baby steps and it really does help. I'm still not that super clean person but since I started my kitchen and bathroom are almost always clean which is pretty darn good.
ReplyDeleteLiving on the road in an 18 wheeler the chore I hate most is laundry. Truckers with time and parking restrictions find it difficult to wash the clothes as regularly as one might like. As for the rest, thankfully, I share a house with a family that has older kids that do the cleaning. These are NOT normal kids as most times they ACTUALLY enjoy doing chores. It's refreshing to see their willingness to pitch in and help keep house.
ReplyDeleteI kinda feel like everything/everyone in my house is working against me and any attempts toward order. It is amazing how quickly a space can go from order to chaos!
ReplyDeleteI like to use my disorganisation as a positive! For example, I rarely clean out the car after an outing and so the next timie we go to the park I have a picnic blanket, jackets, gumboots and hats for the kids and often a ball or frisbee to play with - and give the impression of being ultra-organised!!
ReplyDeleteBut I hate laundry and have piles of it (clean and dirty) all over my house)!!
I don't mind housework so much, but I HATE trying to motivate myself to do it. It isn't staying focused on the chores that bothers me, it's the getting off my behind and starting them. I think I might prefer some ADD to what I have, which seems to just be laziness :)
ReplyDeleteI usually have to do my wash 2x after it sits too long in the washer all wet. I had this nice schedule all set and then life happens or DS won't take a nap. I work hard and then get burnt out. It's hard being a grown up!
ReplyDeleteYou post reminded me of this cartoon I once happened upon:
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/06/this-is-why-ill-never-be-adult.html
Your post could have come from my own mouth. I am horrible at all things domestic with the exception of sewing. I often feel guilty that I don't clean more but I'm 37 and I doubt I'm going to wake up one day, and poof, I'm a domestic goddess. lol. What makes it worse, in my opinion, is that I don't even have kids. It's just me, my husband and our animals. I can't even imagine what it would be like with another human...
ReplyDeleteThank you all for your comments, I am glad there are other people like me out in the world :)
ReplyDeleteMy dirty little secret is that I've even tried, and failed, at Flylady, maybe I should try again, new house, fresh start and all that!